Piece for Peace

Listen Now: "You don't give your heart in pieces" - Bethel, Pieces, Have it All 

Pieces, broken and scattered pieces; it's the way we feel when God sends us a trial, when we are faced with fear, put in a tough situation or even going about our day-to-day activities failing to sense that God is with us. What about when people let us down, when our dreams and hopes don't turn out according to our plans or when our goals become bigger than our God? Have you ever stopped to think that maybe God isn't missing, we're just missing the point. God doesn't give us His heart in pieces, yet every day we give God pieces of our heart, our life, our time, our trust and our thoughts.

Jesus is called the Prince of Peace, but sometimes we treat Him like the prince of piece, only taking time to think about His death and resurrection over times like Easter, Communion or when we decide to read the Gospels once every couple of months. How can we expect to truly find Jesus, if we fail to seek Him wholeheartedly?

"You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart" Jeremiah 29:11

In the book of Hosea, God instructs Hosea to marry a promiscuous woman who ends up being adulterous. God uses this story to show us how Israel has been betraying God by loving and lusting after things other than Himself.

1. We Belong to God:

God doesn't need us yet He chose us. "Yet I will show love to Judah; and I will save them—not by bow, sword or battle, or by horses and horsemen, but I, the Lord their God, will save them." Hosea 1:7

God is the only one that can save us and the only one who can save others. God is a jealous God, we need to remember that our life and the lives of the ones we love belong to God. He makes the decisions, He gets the glory, we are His people and He is our God.

2. Love God With All Your Heart:

'I will not show my love to her children, because they are the children of adultery. Their mother has been unfaithful and has conceived them in disgrace. She said, ‘I will go after my lovers, who give me my food and my water, my wool and my linen, my olive oil and my drink.’ Hosea 2:4-5

How often do we confess with out mouth that we love God above all else, yet we choose things daily over His presence. I spent an entire year longing after what I thought was a dream God gave me and it gave birth to things in my heart that were not from God. 'I will not show my love to her children, because they are the children of adultery'  I conceived self-righteousness, entitlement and wariness as I seeked to complete tasks rather than seeking more of Jesus.

What about when you get what you want? The food, the water, the linen etc. Last year I met the man of my dreams, He loves Jesus, serves whole-heartily and respects and treats me the way every girl deserves to be treated. But ever so often I have to remind myself that I said "I do" to Jesus, who is and forever will be the lover of my soul, my groom, before and even after the day I say "I do" to my earthly husband.

3. Find Jesus and You'll Find a Way.

"Therefore I will block her path with thornbushes; I will wall her in so that she cannot find her way." Hosea 2:6

Most times we think the more we practice the better we will be, the more we work the more we will achieve, the more time we sow the more we will reap and after a while we become so consumed with our doing that we forget who we are becoming. If our actions start affecting our heart instead of our heart affecting our actions then we start to lose sight of our path amongst the thornbushes.

"She will chase after her lovers but not catch them; she will look for them but not find them." Hosea 2:7

When we chase after the things we love instead of the One whom we love, there will always be a longing for more, a whole that cannot be filled, a missing piece that cannot be replaced.

4. Acknowledge God as the Source

"She has not acknowledged that I was the one who gave her the grain, the new wine and oil, who lavished on her the silver and gold-- which they used for Baal." Hosea 2:8

Day after day we give recognition to others and we desire to be recognised, celebrated and praised. We may forget that every good thing comes from God and put our trust in things other than God. Who do you acknowledge as your source of information, joy, peace, affirmation and love. When we lose sight of God as the source our heart of thankfulness turns into a heart of self-righteousness. God will withdraw what withdraws you from Him, when you place your trust or desires in something or someone other than Him.

"Therefore I will take away my grain when it ripens, and my new wine when it is ready." Hosea 2:9

5. God will Expose your Heart

"So now I will expose her lewdness before the eyes of her lovers; no one will take her out of my hands." Hosea 2:10

When you set your eyes on things other than God, you heart will be filled with things other than the fruits of the spirit. You'll become defensive and insecure, compromise on decision and choices that were once steadfast and immovable, be tired and worn out as you do things out of your own strength rather than from the overflow of God's strength in you, become desensitised, losing compassion, in the things that once brought you to tears in thankfulness and so on.

BUT.... (read Hosea 2:14 - 23)

• God will draw you back into the quiet place and the Holy Spirit will start ministering to your soul.
• God will restore your fruits and it will give others hope.

• He will restore your passion as in the days you first fell in love with Him.

• God will be faithful to you even when you weren't faithful to Him. He is your Husband, your first love.

• God will remove your desire for anything else other than Himself.

• God will restore your security, confidence and safety.

• God loves you daily even when you choose things over Him daily "I would rather do..", "let me first do.." instead of seeking first the Kingdom of God and all of it's righteousness.

 "I will betroth you to me forever; I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion. I will betroth you in faithfulness, and you will acknowledge the LORD." Hosea 2: 19-20

God is everything you have ever been looking for, everything you have wanted and everything you have ever needed. Aim to see Him in the midst of it all, when you find yourself lusting after things other than God, don't beat yourself up, give it to God and He will put all the missing pieces back together. He gave it all to be with you, so give it all back to Him! 

Have a blessed Easter. 

Becoming a Heavy Wait Champion

"Why wait?" The concept of waiting has grown dim in a world ruled by impatience, we want things now, without delay, not grasping the concept of what it means to wait in joyful hope for the promises of God.

Waiting Brings Clarity and Patience Brings Peace:

Towards the end of Exodus we see that Moses went up Mount Sinai to receive the commandments written by God. The people grew restless as they waited on Moses to return, having not heard from Moses or God they decided to take matters into their own hands:

"When the people saw that Moses was so long in coming down from the mountain, they gathered around Aaron and said, “Come, make us gods who will go before us. As for this fellow Moses who brought us up out of Egypt, we don’t know what has happened to him.” Exodus 32:1

All too often I have fooled myself into thinking I have waited on God, all the while I've gone ahead of Him and did it my way hoping He would bless it. We are so quick to manipulate situations thinking it's God's will, resulting in failed relationships and wrong decisions, when all we need to do is remain patient in times of pressure, and wait on God's voice of instruction instead of listening to the voices around us, like Aaron did. They say it's a good thing be a go-getter, but I've come to realise that it's better to be a God-getter, as God will work the world for those who work His will. Sometimes holding back requires more faith than stepping out, as we wait on God to fulfil His promises in our lives.

Let God Lead you:

"He took what they handed him and made it into an idol cast in the shape of a calf, fashioning it with a tool. Then they said, “These are your gods, Israel, who brought you up out of Egypt.” Exodus 32:4

You have a choice to be led by two things: Obedience or Emotions. We often make our own promises and try lead God instead of letting God lead us, basing our decisions on things that make us feel good rather than waiting on God to give us what's best. "What are you worshiping in your wait?" If something is distracting you from giving God all the glory, then it probably doesn’t belong in your life. God will bless what blesses you and will take away what takes you away from Him. Let Him lead you into all the promises He has for you.

In Our Waiting He is Creating

Just like God waited on us to give Him our heart, we have to learn to wait on what His heart desires to give to us, and as we do that the desires of His heart will become the desires of our heart.

"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me." Psalm 51:10

In Exodus we read that pure Gold was used to create the ark of the testimony, mercy seat and all the furnishings of the tent of meeting. When Moses or any of the high priests entered into the tent of meeting they were anointed with pure oil and pure or sacred spices were made into incenses and set before the testimony. Jewish men also had to be circumcised and only clean animals could be sacrificed to God for the atonement of sins.

God reminded me that He only gives good gifts to His children, so in order for me to be a gift to others, I need to be a pure sacrifice unto to Him. He has given me a pure spirit through salvation, a pure body through wise choices and a pure heart through daily heart circumcisions.

"Blessed are the pure in heart for they will see God" Matthew 5:8

In order to see God in every situation and relationship I have to allow Him to create in me a new heart, circumcising setbacks, struggles and bad fruits from it, like impatience, selfishness and insecurity. Sometimes we don't know what the promise will look like but we should know what fruit we want the seeds of our patience to produce.

Ps Steven Furtick puts it this way: "The Bible is not filled with ways to find the right person, it is filled with ways to become the right person"

Pure means unaltered and not contaminated by the world, let the Bible circumcise and give you a pure heart daily. If  the people in your life are willing to wait while He creates, then you know that God has given you something worth waiting for!

Grace, Grace:

"Now go, lead the people to the place I spoke of, and my angel will go before you." Exodus 32:34

Even though the people were impatient and didn’t wait on God, God still led them to the promise. God is a God of His Word so even if you fail He will not fail you. He will direct your path to align with His promise

"Therefore, [inheriting] the promise is the outcome of faith and depends [entirely] on faith, in order that it might be given as an act of grace (unmerited favor), to make it stable and valid and guaranteed to all his descendants" Romans 4:16 AMP

We need to acknowledge that all good gifts are given to us and not taken by us. Once we wait for what is given, it will be valid and guaranteed and won't be taken away.

Are We There Yet?

"To those who by patient persistence in well-doing seek [unseen but sure] glory and honor and [the eternal blessedness of] immortality, He will give eternal life." Romans 2:7

The moment you said yes to Jesus He gave you glory, honour and immortality, now the only thing left for you to do is follow peace and pursue patience. Following peace is like taking a photograph, you need to know what you want to capture, find the perfect subject and wait for the perfect moment, you'll feel it in your heart, the moment the light hits the lens and everything is illuminated. To capture light, is to capture the very essence of who God is. If you can find God in the thing you are waiting for then you'll know it's God's gift and not just a good gift.

I am so inspired by the story of boxer, Manny Pacquiao, he could only dream of where God wanted to lead him. Through his practice and preparation he probably expected to win the fight against Floyd Mayweather, as many others did too. Although he didn't win the fight in the end God used him to win thousands of souls for His kingdom, which just goes to show that God's ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts. Every decision needs a vision, every victory requires a battle and every promise requires preparation: this is the power of patience.

The God things in life are worth waiting for...

The Pursuit Of Happiness

"We always want what we can't have" is a saying we have all grown accustom to. We are on a constant pursuit of happiness because we choose to covet things instead of trusting God's new and everlasting covenant, Jesus...

The Pursuit of Power

"The LORD hardened the heart of Pharaoh king of Egypt, so that he pursued the Israelites, who were marching out boldly." Ex 14:8

In the book of Exodus, after Pharaoh releases the Israelites from slavery, he is quick to realise that he made a mistake and he makes it his mission to recapture the Israelites. Pharaoh sat on a throne, he exalted himself above anyone else, yet he needed the Israelites to serve him to feel superior, to feel important, to feel accepted and to feel appreciated. My question to you is, what are you pursuing to make you feel powerful? Whether it be a position of authority or people to empower you, we need to remember that all promotion and position of influence comes from God.

The Pursuit of People

"The Egyptians pursued them, all Pharaoh’s horses and chariots and his horsemen and his army, and overtook them encamped at the sea, by Pi-hahiroth, in front of Baal-zephon." Ex 14:9

Pharaoh and the Egyptians pursued after the Israelites, who were called God's people, and that's exactly it, they were God's people not their people. So how can we pursue after people if they don't even belong to us? Whether it be pursuing after the attention and love of new friends, old friends, a person you like, a lover, or even a family member, we have to realise that they belong to God and not to us.

"Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." Ecc 4:1

A three fold cord takes time to be woven together and once you find people who's mind, body and soul tie with yours, then you know God has blessed you with relationships that can endure anything.

The Pursuit of Promises

"Therefore, the people contended with Moses, and said, Give us water that we may drink. And Moses said to them, Why do you find fault with me? Why do you tempt the Lord and try His patience?" Ex 17:2

The Israelites were in constant pursuit of God's promises instead of being present in His presence. From pursuing after the Promised Land to pursuing after something as simple as water, they failed to trust and wait patiently on God. It's like rushing to open the biggest present under the Christmas tree, only to realise that the gift wasn't actually meant for you. If we rush ahead of God we will get what we want but it won't be what God wants for us!

"If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!" Matt 7:11

To put it plainly; God's promises are His promises not ours, and we shouldn't let our persistence compromise His promises, we need to wait on God to gift us in His perfect timing.

Learn to be Lead

"The Egyptians pursued them, and all Pharaoh's horses and chariots and horsemen followed them into the sea." Ex 14:23

God appeared to and instructed Moses to lead His people to the Promise Land before Moses even knew God. Moses led the Israelites across the Red Sea knowing that God would protect them, but the Egyptians pursued after the Israelites without any reassurance of their safety. God won't lead you, where He won't protect you. God is the lamp unto our feet, therefore we need to let Him light up our next steps before running ahead of Him!

God Pursues Us

How can we pursue what doesn't belong to us? If all belongs to God then we need to learn to surrender what we want most to the one who wants us most. When you pursue someone you often find yourself wanting to be around them all the time, taking an interest in their interests, becoming a bit obsessed...

We are God's object of obsession, He loves us so deeply that He pursues us even when we choose to pursue everything else other than Him. He wanted to be around us so much that He became flesh and walked the earth with us. He is so passionate about our purpose that His plans became our promises and His Son became our Saviour.

Prison Break

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines a prison as a place or situation from which you cannot escape or a state of confinement or captivity. Every day we are exposed to situations where we may feel imprisoned, either kept in the holding cell of a temporary situation, held captive for an extended period of time or even isolated in solitary confinement.

The Holding Cell:

The holding cell are those temporary situations we can’t change, but somehow ends up affecting our emotions and reactions. The holding cell can be as simple as traffic or even petty arguments with your siblings, parents or friends. The holding cell can lead to long term imprisonment of your feelings, emotions and reactions if you don’t learn to deal with it there and then. People will always irritate you, time will always go faster than you’d like, there will always be someone who is better than you, richer than you and smarter than you and you won’t always get what you want… but Jesus will set you free if you learn to surrender everything to Him on a daily basis and choose to respond in love as an ambassador of Christ.

“But what does it matter, so long as either way, whether for personal ends or in all honesty, Christ is being proclaimed? And in that I now rejoice, yes, and I shall rejoice hereafter also.” Philippians 1:18

Long-Term Imprisonment:

Long-term imprisonment can mean several things to a number of people. Mine more specifically being insecurity, impatience, fear and frustration. Even memories of one’s past can hold one captive for years on end, like the wrong relationships, bad decisions, distrust, abuse or failure. I believe that it’s in the long term imprisonment that we can either choose to lean on Jesus, accept His grace and let the joy of the Lord be our strength or we can choose to give up hope and not experience the abundant life God has set out for us!

“This is in keeping with my own eager desire and persistent expectation and hope, that I shall not disgrace myself nor be put to shame in anything; but that with the utmost freedom of speech and unfailing courage, now as always heretofore, Christ will be magnified and get glory and praise in this body of mine and be boldly exalted in my person, whether through life or through death.” Philippains 1:20

Solitary Confinement:

This can be defined as a form of imprisonment in which a prisoner is isolated from any human contact. Ever felt like you’ve had to make a decision or go through something completely alone, that turning to friends and family or even to Jesus felt somewhat impossible? Ever become so consumed with your life that you have forgotten to spend time with the one who gave you your perfect life in the first place, and you go to bed wondering why you have a yearning for something that can’t be satisfied? The moment we isolate ourselves from God, we find ourselves in solitary confinement. The only way to set yourself free is to make a choice, a choice to run towards Jesus at all costs knowing that the confinement you are in is only temporary! Sometimes we are put in an environment to show the deliverance and salvation from God as seen in Philippians 1:28

“And [also] most of the brethren have derived fresh confidence in the Lord because of my chains and are much more bold to speak and publish fearlessly the Word of God [acting with more freedom and indifference to the consequences].” Philippians 1.14

Time and time again Hollywood has shown us the impact imprisonment can have on an individual but Jesus and Paul teaches us that our imprisonment can lead to someone else’s empowerment. Sometimes by us being bound, just as Paul was, we have the ability to set others free. We just have to choose to rise above every and any situation and set an example for others to follow. We can’t choose our situations or the length of our sentence but we can choose the way we react and deal with it. Prison will reveal your true motives and the true motives of others in your life.

“It is true that some preach Christ out of envy and rivalry, but others out of goodwill. The latter do so out of love, knowing that I am put here for the defense of the gospel.” Philippians 1:15

You can preach the Gospel through your spirit and willpower to overcome.

How can you set yourself free? It’s simple;  Let your prayers and a bountiful supply of the Spirit of Jesus Christ turn your prison into your preservation (for the spiritual health and welfare of your own soul) Philippians 1:19

Your prison can develop patience, and patience can develop peace and peace will set you free! My prayer is that in 2015 you will let God give you the keys to unlock peace in your life and to open the gate to freedom in every situation and circumstance.

Check Please!

Over the past few months God challenged me with one simple question; “Do you live to please people or do you live to please Me?” Life is a constant battle, we seek acceptance from friends, desire attention from loved ones, strive for the appreciation of leaders, yearn to be acknowledged by the one and long for the approval of our parents while on an unmerited pursuit to earn the favour of God.

“Here it is in a nutshell: Just as one person did it wrong and got us in all this trouble with sin and death, another person did it right and got us out of it. But more than just getting us out of trouble, he got us into life! One man said no to God and put many people in the wrong; one man said yes to God and put many in the right.” Romans 5:18-19 (MSG)

Adam and Jesus were both created by God and purposed as life giving vessels, Adam and Eve vessels for humanity and Jesus a vessel for eternity, created for the same destiny, but resulting in different destinations all because of one simple decision.

Why the different outcomes one might ask? Adam bowed down to the created (Eve) and Jesus bowed down to His creator (God). Adam lived for one and all died, but Jesus lived for one and died for all.

 “And to the man he said, “Since you listened to your wife and ate from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat, the ground is cursed because of you.  All your life you will struggle to scratch a living from it.” Genesis 3:17 (NLT)

Every generation from that point onward was cursed as a result of Adam’s one act of disobedience. He was in good council yet he didn't seek the council of God when faced with a simple choice. If you choose to make decisions based on your feelings towards the people around you, it will steer you away from all God intends to accomplish through you. Our reason for living is to make others happy without letting our happiness depend on others. If you strive for the approval of people and receive it, you will always be striving to maintain it, you might start to feel like a burden and eventually burn out.

When you are a people pleaser you will in-turn become a people praiser; thanking people for the recognition they give you instead of thanking God for using you as a vessel of His goodness.

“Don’t you realize that you become the slave of whatever you choose to obey? You can be a slave to sin, which leads to death, or you can choose to obey God, which leads to righteous living.” Romans 6:16

Then God sent Jesus, whose decisions to follow God’s will above all else gave us eternal life. People tried to distract Him from His destiny, He, however, decided to follow God’s will instead of the people’s pleas.

“From that time Jesus began to show His disciples that He must go to Jerusalem, and suffer many things from the elders and chief priests and scribes, and be killed, and be raised up on the third day. Peter took Him aside and began to rebuke Him, saying, “God forbid it, Lord! This shall never happen to You.” But He turned and said to Peter, “Get behind Me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to Me; for you are not setting your mind on God’s interests, but man’s.” Matthew 16: 21-23

Often those closest to us think they know what’s best for us, but our future extends far beyond us therefore we need to be selfless in our decisions. We are just a spec in God’s spectacular plan therefore we need to surrender our life to God and not to people to live in true freedom.

“Human hands can’t serve his needs—for he has no needs. He himself gives life and breath to everything, and he satisfies every need.” Acts 17:25

God doesn't need us to please Him either. He didn't create us to serve Him, He created us to serve one another. God said it is not good for man to be alone so He created Eve the trouble comes in when we turn to others before turning to Jesus. All God desires is our gratitude in exchange for His grace and every act of obedience is an act of gratitude. Instead of staying in the season we are in to make others happy, we should continue reinventing ourselves in the identity of Christ.

The only way to explain it is to look at those who create, Peter, Paul and the rest who established the early Church, artists, authors, and poets such as Emily Dickinson, Anne Frank, Vincent van Gogh and John Keats. All of these created because they had a passion and love for their craft but only achieved recognition long after they were gone. Just like God created us but only received the proper recognition He desired after the death and resurrection of Jesus. If we continue to serve people and love God because we have a passion for Jesus and an innate desire to see the world know the same Jesus that saved us, I believe that our will, will always line up with the will of God.

“Blessed are the pure in heart for they will see God.” Matthew 5:8 (NIV)

Keep Calm and Carry On.

"Then He said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me.” Luke 9:23.

Take up your cross daily, is a phrase that carries a lot weight. We stand at a cross road of choice, we can chose to make the cross heavy and somewhat of a burden or we can embrace the weight of responsibility knowing that our life and the lives of others will be better because of it.

After Jesus was sentenced to death, He experienced a beating that made Him unrecognizable. Sometimes we go through things, to take us to things. When we turn from our selfish ways we may become unrecognizable to many people from our old life but as long as we know that our identity remains in Christ, we have the courage to get up and carry our cross, leaving behind the people who don’t want to familiarize themselves with our new identity.

Know where you are heading:

Jesus knew what was awaiting Him at the top of Golgotha, but He had a choice, either to focus on His pain or to focus on His purpose.

"And just as my Father has granted me a Kingdom, I now grant you the right to eat and drink at my table in my Kingdom. And you will sit on thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel." Luke 22:29-30

Become Kingdom focused, choosing to die to yourself daily and focusing on the bigger picture, only then will you have the strength to endure to the very end.

Take small steps:

"If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones.” Luke 9:23.

I’m sure every step Jesus took wasn’t easy but it was necessary to take Him to where He needed to be. Most Sundays at Kid’s church I chose to prepare the offering message even though they stare at me with blank expressions. I say yes when asked to pray in public, at connect groups, or at church even though I hate it, I give 100% in all my design work even though I can barely keep my eyes open, I am devoted to spending time with God no matter how busy my day gets, I share the passion I have for Jesus on social media and my blog in hope that atleast 1 person will come to know Christ because of it, even though I have been deleted or unfollowed by a numbers of annoyed people. I trust that if I am faithful in the small steps I need to take no matter what, God will entrust me with greater, life changing, opportunities to contribute towards His Kingdom.

Pick up your own cross:

If you are in church long enough you tend to see many familiar faces leave, and not come back, I struggled to understand why, and I tend to take it upon myself to try and bring them back, without any luck. After seeking council from God, I realised our responsibility is to carry our own cross and not the cross of others.

“Whoever does not persevere and carry his own cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple.” Luke 14:27

Let me explain; If we have to carry our own cross as well as the cross of others how much more difficult are we making it to reach our final destination. Our responsibility is to disciple ours not discipline others! Discipline is self taught with a willing heart. We should continue pointing people to God, encouraging them that there is hope in the midst of their hardship, but He simply wants us to direct them not dictate to them. As leaders we should take responsibility for others but to a certain extent. We can’t save anyone on behalf of God, in the end it is their decision. We can lead a horse to the water but we can’t force it to drink, our duty is to plant the seed and let God do the watering.

You are not alone:

With that being said, God will never let you carry your cross alone, even Jesus had Simon from Cyrene to help Him carry His cross up the mountain. We have Jesus right beside us carrying our cross every single day, His burden is light and His yolk is easy.

Get up when you fall:

Yes we might trip and drop the cross along the way, Jesus fell three trips before He reached the top, but all we need to do is pick it up daily and continue walking and we need to encourage others to do the same. With every fall we become stronger because we have the greatest encourager of all!

“But I have pleaded in prayer for you, Simon, that your faith should not fail. So when you have repented and turned to me again, strengthen your brothers.” Luke 22:32

It’s never to late:

Just like Jesus saved the resentful criminal who hung next to him on the cross, Jesus will use every bit of his energy to pull us out of our pits of despair, and we should have the same mentality with others. Those who seem hopelessly lost will always have a glimmer of hope and it’s those people that God has called us to reach. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

What is the cross?

#CrossEqualsLove. We should carry our love for Christ daily, as well as our love for others. We need to set out with a purpose to passionately seek and serve no matter how hopeless a situation may seem. If we fall along the way God will always be there to lift us up again. Lets keep our eyes fixed on the cross as a reminder that we are victorious because of what Christ has already done.

Loving Love: Part 1

Love, such a small word yet it has the power to move the world forward, the power to make people do the unthinkable, the power to shatter or to make everything matter. There are so many different forms of love, from the tattooed, unchangeable, everlasting love for family, to the enduring, long hours, no sleep, and focused love for your job. Then you get the crazy, deep, random, humorous love of friendship and then the status, ego and argument driven, bonding love of sports or a hobby. But the first part of my two part series, I want to focus on the heart racing, palm sweating, ever changing, intense love of romance, then justifying it with the agape love that is Jesus Christ.

Let me just make something clear before I continue, I have absolutely no experience when it comes to this topic, I’ve never been in love, but I’ve learnt loads of stuff just by watching the people I know embark on life’s only mission, to love and to be loved in return.

Forever Alone:

Many of us are still single, for some it’s the perfect season, almost like summer, they can’t imagine having to give up the outdoorsy feeling of the single life. For others they wait for winter, waiting to feel the warmth of a burning fire. Please, don’t fool yourself into thinking that you will be perfectly fine alone if Mr/Mrs Perfect never comes along, truth is no matter how old you are, you and I both know you will always be looking, waiting and hoping for love. So how can we feel fulfilment of the heart when the thought of being alone forever is only filling our brain with anxiety?

God gave Adam an Eve, he gave Abraham a Sarah, he gave Isaac a Rebecca and the list goes on, if God can do it for them he can do it for us. Dating shows don’t have anything on the creator of love, love will come at the perfect time, when you least expect it, it’s going to be epic and well worth the wait. And if you do end up never falling in love at least you have more time to love others who are in desperate need of it!

Friend Zoned:

I think that title carries more fear than the name Voldamort. From a personal point of view I am the type of girl who gets along with guys very well because of my interests, I go through phases where I am really close to someone and then boooom that dreaded word is dropped ‘Friends’ whether it be me saying it to ensure that it is purely friendship or me using the term ‘best friends’ to protect myself from getting hurt or even using it casually because I already made a preconception that my new ‘best friend’ will never be interested in me so might as well friend zone myself. And then there is the part where he drops the ‘best friend’ bomb first and I’m left thinking wait, what? Are you for real?  I have repeated this line to myself numerous times over the years ‘Always the best friend, never the girlfriend’. Maybe it’s because I’m too nice, too friendly and everyone loves a heart breaker, but then I think to myself, why should I change who I am to get someone to like me?

There are two answers to this, either speak up, or let the feelings fade! Friendship is as beautiful as any relationship; sometimes friendship lasts longer and is less complicated. Truth is your destiny is pre-planned, if God wants you to have that person, he will give him/her to you. Be patient, don’t chase it and don’t force it either.

Second Choice:

All of us want to be first, to feel like the only girl in the room, to be deeply cared for above all else. Sounds like a chick flick doesn’t it? God made me a promise long ago, in Genesis 29-30 The story of the love triangle between Jacob, Rachel and Leah is discussed. You see, Jacob fell in love with Rachel, but Laban, Rachel’s father, said that Jacob must wed Leah too if he wants to be with Rachel. Rachel was much prettier that Leah was but God never short changes anyone; he blessed Leah with the opportunity to have children where Rachel couldn’t. Leah thought that Jacob would love her more because she could offer him more than Rachel’s beauty, but no matter how hard Leah tried it was always Rachel, the first choice. My question to you is, are you willing to fight for the one you love? Or would you rather have someone who will go to battle for you? Find comfort in the fact that although you weren’t his first choice, you are His first choice and He chose you, and fell in love with you before you were even born. He will never leave you nor forsake you! He will bless you with someone who will want to show you off to the world. Don’t ever settle for second best.

There will always be someone better than you, but you have to be confident enough in yourself to believe that you are as deserving of love as the girl who sits opposite you holding hands with her boyfriend who can’t stop smiling at her. Instead of being envious celebrate it, because when you find that one of a kind love, you’ll be able to enjoy it without any guilt when you too show public displays of affection. In my next post I will stretch the topic further, covering the following factors: Don’t settle, love to be loved (trusting love) and not to make one person your everything. I will also talk about what I think God wants from us when it comes to the callous yet exhilarating word which is Love... Keep your eyes peeled, post will follow soon.