Active vs. Passive Christian

I want to pose this question to you; “What is the point of going to church if you are not going to let it change you?”

⁴⁷ As for everyone who comes to me and hears my words and puts them into practice, I will show you what they are like. ⁴⁸ They are like a man building a house, who dug down deep and laid the foundation on rock. When a flood came, the torrent struck that house but could not shake it, because it was well built. ⁴⁹ But the one who hears my words and does not put them into practice is like a man who built a house on the ground without a foundation. The moment the torrent struck that house, it collapsed and its destruction was complete.” Luke 6:47-49

It’s so easy to hear God’s word and not listen, to pray without concentration, to believe without conviction, to have faith without trust and to change without the intention to make a change.

The majority of us are driven individuals, if we want to achieve a specific goal we actively pursue it until we succeed so shouldn’t we carry the same mentality into our walk with Jesus Christ? Shouldn’t we stop at nothing to see our friends and family saved and be compassionate and loving to every single person who crosses our path? I love what Brian Houston says in his new book How To Maximise Your Life, “To have a Kingdom spirit means you have a vision that is bigger than you – you will always be devising generous strategies or plans to bless others.” Jesus actively pursued his purpose without hesitation he was always moving and bringing about change to crowds of people. He never gave up until the very end when “It was done”.

People often like to compare the Holy Spirit to the wind, “You can’t see it, but you can feel it”. If the spirit who lived in Christ now lives in us then we too should be free and moving like the wind touching everyone and changing everything in our path. We can choose to be a subtle breeze or a gale force wind. A breeze is comfortable, people delight in it, but it doesn’t bring about change, the leaves only move a short distance until the breeze dies down. A gale force wind however, is uncomfortable, people try to hide from it, but it moves and affects everything around it. It doesn’t only move one or two leaves but a whole bunch of leaves will soon follow the motion of the wind. I want to encourage you to actively pursue God like a gale force wind, it may make you feel uncomfortable, people may try to avoid the truth, hide behind walls of empty promises but gale force winds are able to bend the firmest trees. You will inspire others to come along with you and with that motion many more people will venture on the journey too. Your willingness to never give up will bend and shape the mindset of those you deem as completely lost. When the truth moves it brings about change.

We weren’t saved just to be well behaved. We weren’t called to push people away but to point them to the way. We were chosen to reach further and make a different with every motion. We made our decision to ensure that people hear the truth with great precision.

You see we are so focused on being loved that we forget that our mission is to love everyone else unconditionally. With the power that Jesus had he could have easily built himself up and become one of the most loved individuals at that time. But he loved us more than his desire to be loved, he delivered the truth and although it made people feel uncomfortable, he was unapologetic about it which led to his crucifixion.

Can I encourage you to actively pursue God’s calling in your life, don’t sit back and allow others to do the job for you. Yes the church may have amazing leaders but you too can become a great leader and Jesus may be our shepherd but “The student is not above the teacher, but everyone who is fully trained will be like their teacher.” Luke 6:40. We will never be Jesus but we can try with all our might to live by the principles he lived by, leading by example in every area of our life.

Jesus left the earth and entrusted us with the responsibility to carry out the message of his good works in the generations to come and nothing feels worse than disappointing your father. Follow God persistently with a pure heart in 2014 and I can promise you that you will see God’s blessing in every area of your life as well as in the life of others. 

The Dawn of a New Year

"The Lord will make you the head, not the tail. If you pay attention to the commands of the Lord your God that I give you this day and carefully follow them, you will always be at the top, never at the bottom." Deuteronomy 28:13

As the sun set on another incredible year, people exchanged laughs about the crazy memories they’ve shared, they reflected on the loved ones lost, new births celebrated and true loves found. They raised their glasses in honour of all they have achieved and all they are going to achieve, all their challenges overcome and their incessant battles won. As we look to Facebook to remind us of our “highlights” of 2013, can I maybe just encourage you to look at the lowlights which weren’t necessarily in the spotlight but have been a lamp unto your feet to get you to where you are today. The little moments that have shaped your heart to be bolder and more courageous, the moments that have stretched you to trust more and to be content with the love that God has for you. If I look at my year in reverse it has truly been the best year of my life, in 2012 God showed me a bit of the world, last year God showed me a bit of His world! I can honestly say that if you can’t sense God in the sunlight, in the smell of the ocean or in the splendour of nature then it’s all useless and the beauty of the world is without purpose.

Who knew that my travels wouldn’t end when I arrived home from London on the 14^th of December 2012, but that God had greater travels in store for me, to take me to new heights and to push me beyond anything I could have ever imagined, challenging me to rise above and beyond any obstacle I had to face with surety that His love would be there to catch me when I fall. As humans, love is just as much a necessity as water, light and oxygen, I’m happy I’ve found a love that never runs dry, a love that glows in the dark and a love that makes me feel like I can breathe again, I found my hope and love in Jesus Christ.

Here is a personal highlight reel of everything God has done for me in 2013:

My Job:

When I got back from overseas it was very, very tough trying to get back into the design industry, I went to several interviews all posing different problems, I was praying about it and wanted God to bless me with the right job. I met up with my friend for sushi and she gave me the contact number of the design agency her company uses and low and behold it was perfect, very close to home and they were indeed looking for a new designer but haven’t advertised the position yet. I went for the interview and got the job. During my first 3 months I wasn’t really entrusted with any work so the boss decided to cut my salary to half of what I was originally earning. For the first time in my life I doubted myself as a designer but instead of giving up, I decided to press into prayer and ask God every morning to bless me with more responsibility and then deliverance, and so He did. Each week I got more tasks and more clients and everyone was beyond happy with the work I was delivering, I received an increase and come year end I was running campaigns for huge clients. Sometimes God knocks you off your high horse so that you will become dependent on Him and not on your own abilities. God kept reminding me that 2013 was a year of preparation, and that this job was an “in the meantime job” I held onto God’s promise and now I’m lucky enough to be part of the Internship programme at Hillsong Church next year. The company I worked at was amazing, but I know that God has called me to do something even greater!

The Passing of My Uncle:

My uncle passed away at the beginning of the year, although he was only an uncle through marriage to my aunt, the loss of his life was no less painful. The family fought the good fight, we prayed and I fasted, and we truly believed for a miracle, but unfortunately God took him home. Through the loss of His life, the rest of my family gained life. We have not only become closer to each other but we have drawn closer to God. The loss of my uncle made me realise how desperately I needed to have God in my life which ultimately led to my salvation, and for that I will always be grateful. You see sometimes we have to lose the things closest to us to realise that inner strength can only be found from the sacrificial love of our saviour.

Driver’s License:

After failing my drivers twice in 2011, having my learners expire during my move to London in 2012, I was determined to make 2013 my year. You see some people are gifted with the ability to drive, and then there is me... frozen at the thought of ally-docking and pulling away on an incline. Not having my license made it very difficult to serve at my church so I decided to start this blog in the mean time. I made a promise to God and told Him that if He gave me my license I would serve my heart out. God blessed me with my license but because He always gives you more than you expect He also made it possible for me to use my dad’s car in the evenings as my dad’s working hours were shortened a week after I got my license. I now serve in Hillsong Kids and run a connect group with one of my best friends, Tara.  Can I just encourage you to get plugged in at church during 2014, not only will you develop a deeper relationship with God but you will start to see people the way God sees them, the more time you spend serving and growing in fellowship with people the more you will love them and have a deep desire to elevate and encourage them to become the best that they can be. To love others and to be genuinely loved in return is one of God’s greatest blessings.

Meeting New Friends:

Okay if you know me, or know me well, I’ve probably tried to make you my best friend by smothering you in hugs, adding you on Facebook and/or following you on Instagram. I don’t know why but I have an insane obsession with meeting new people, I wasn’t always like this but it’s become a habit of late. At the start of the year “I was just a small town girl, living in a lonely world...” okay enough of my Journey rendition, but being part of a huge church like Hillsong has its perks and its drawbacks. I found it very difficult to make friends at church especially when everyone already knew each other. After I was saved, I felt very alone, I didn’t really want to party hard anymore but I didn’t have a different group of friends to just chill with when my other friends were out partying, but after weeks upon months of prayer I met some amazing girl friends at Encounter the youth conference and as they say, “The rest is history”. Now I have the amazing Blackpanndjat, 4Shore and my connect girls, yes we name our girl groups because we cool like that. God still continues to bless me with amazing new friends all the time and this continues to be God’s greatest blessing in my life.

Favour is yours for the taking, you just have to be willing to acknowledge and accept the blessing. People often use the term, “Everything happens for a reason” to justify the so called failures in their life, but we sometimes forget that all our decisions should be within reason and that things will work out according to His reasoning no matter what silly mistakes we’ve made or what silly mistakes we’re bound to make. Let’s be sure to make 2014 a year of reason, to guarantee that only the best fruits are produced during each season. May you continue to draw close to God no matter what circumstances you are faced with, this is the only way I can promise you a prosperous year ahead!

Can I encourage you to start your year off on the right with the How To Maximise Your Life Devotional by Ps Brian Houston.

Freedom is Fearless

Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la, la-la, it’s Christmas eve tomorrow, and we have so much to be grateful for! What a year it’s been, as 2013 draws to a close, it provides us with the perfect opportunity to reflect on the good and the bad and maybe even those missed opportunities! Yes, those opportunities that passed on by because we were too afraid to step out of our comfort zone. Fear has the ability to delay, deviate and discourage us from fulfilling our God given destiny. If we can recognise what is holding us back I believe it will allow us to change our perspective so that we can move forward without hesitation.

Fear of the Unknown.

"Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”  Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said,“why did you doubt?” Matthew 14:24-31

God gave me a vision of soldiers preparing for battle. Not only do they have to prepare themselves physically but mentally too. They know they’re entering a warzone with an arrow pointed at their head but they enter it anyways! They were willing to fight till death with hope that their kingdom will reign supreme! I believe that if we choose to live life with the same mindset, taking into account that we are fighting for freedom, that our King is the King of Kings and that through Jesus Christ we are already victorious then our battleground becomes a playground. I know it's scary to leave your familiar, comfortable and mundane life behind, but true life only starts once you step out into the unknown, you might have to leave some things behind but the road ahead promises more fulfilment than you could ever imagine! I’m a living testimony along with hundreds upon thousands of people who have decided to give their life to Christ. It's easier to fight for something you believe in and to fight already knowing that you've won, therefore the battle loses its sting, fear doesn't have favour but we do! We are highly favoured by the creator of the heavens and the earth. The only thing holding us back is ourselves.

Fear of Change.

“Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed” John 3:20.

Before I decided to do a 360' turn in my life I never really set any time apart to check my heart. I did anything I wanted, whenever I wanted, without thinking ahead as to what the consequences might be. I wasn’t a terrible person, I was just selfish. I never wanted to confront my problems because then I knew I might have to change. I had a massive revelation just after I was saved, during a praise and worship song, someone on stage was stating “Lord look at my heart, take it, it’s yours” or something to that extent, I remember thinking to myself, “Yikes, do I really want God to see my whole heart? All my hidden agendas and motives, all my plotting and planning, my jealousy and anger, my pride, my lust and my lifestyle? Can’t He just look at the good, the bits of my heart that I wanted Him to see?” Then I realised He can see all of it anyways so I was fighting a losing battle! From that moment I decided to change my thoughts instead of just focusing on changing my ways. Don’t be afraid to do some serious soul searching! If you are afraid of what people might think of the new you, just remember you live for Christ now, and your change will bring about more change than you could have ever imagined.

Fear Before a Blessing.

“Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be. But the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary; you have found favor with God.” Luke 1:29-30

As it is the Christmas season, I decided it would be a great idea to reread and meditate on the nativity story, with that said something really stuck out to me, throughout the Bible whenever an angel appears to bring good news it is often followed with the statement, “Do not be afraid”. When a blessing is staring at us in the face we may feel terrified and confused as to what happens next. I believe it is human nature to always expect the worst. It may prevent us from hearing God’s voice clearly, as we continue to fight His unreasonable requests with our logical mind. The Spirit descended not only for comfort and healing but for direction as well. I know I sometimes fear the Spirit, especially when it comes to praying in tongues or listening to its prompting to do something out of the ordinary like praying for a complete stranger in broad daylight in front of a group of people (yes, He does that), but when fear becomes greater than faith that's when you lose the fruits and gifts of the Spirit! So I just want to encourage you to join me as we venture into 2014 with a heart full of expectancy and faith, the Spirit will move if we give it room to do so. As long as fear is holding us back we are still living by flesh and not by faith. God has overcome all things and if the Spirit lives within us, then we too can achieve all things through Him who gives us strength! God wants us to achieve all He has set out for us, if you feel God prompting you to do something, do it without hesitation, if it doesn't work out it's probably because He wanted you to learn a valuable lesson from the experience! Sometimes God doesn't want us to achieve everything all at once, failure is essential for growth not only in our willingness to never give up but in our faith and hope that we have placed upon our God given purpose.

There are so many fears we have to deal with on a daily basis but if can recognise that we are free, we are favoured and God is faithful in all His ways then I believe we can step into 2014 with our heads held high expecting great things to come because of our willingness to trust God and be coreageous in all our decisions, knowing that if and when we fall, He will be there to catch us and encourage us to never give up. We have an eternity of love and freedom waiting for us, “no fear of condemnation” so keep that in mind when you staring fear in face again!

Can I encourage you to step out of your comfort zone and come and experience what Christmas is truly all about!

Hillsong Church Cape Town

Kinetic Way Off Century Boulevard Century City Cape Town Western Cape.

Christmas Eve: 7.30pm

Christmas Day: 8am, 9.30am and 11am

Have a blessed Christmas, and thank you so much for all your support throughout the year! 

Heart & Soul

“And no one puts new wine into old wineskins. For the wine would burst the wineskins, and the wine and the skins would both be lost. New wine calls for new wineskins.” Mark 2:22 (NLT)

I cannot begin to explain how God has been shaping and moulding me over the past month or so. I think I’ve grown more in November than I have this entire year (queue short jokes here) I’m actually referring to the growth of my heart.

We sing songs at church proclaiming; “Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders, let me walk upon the waters, wherever You would call me” and songs like “More of you, less of me, take this life, Lord it’s yours” without fully understanding the impact it should have on our life. When God asks for our heart, He demands all of our heart, all of our energy and all of our time not just the parts of our life we chose to give Him. If you sit down and think about it, it may feel like a tough journey to venture out on and that’s why most people who start coming to church eventually start to fade and end up living the life they use to live. We sometimes become so focused on changing the world that we forget that change should happen within us first. To avoid having a change of heart allow your heart to be changed first.

We don’t need God to fix our problems we need Him to mend our heart. Problems are part of life, it’s inevitable but the way we react to difficult situations sets us apart from everyone else. If we can look at every minute of our life being carefully orchestrated by God we begin to ask questions like “Lord, what do You want me to learn from this?” instead of stating “Lord, what did I do to deserve this?!”

What I’ve learnt is that I would rather have my heart changed first so that my actions can reflect what my heart truly feels, instead of changing my actions first and doing things half-heartily. Good deeds may get you to the pearly gate but if your heart is for the Lord, heaven will be your reward.

God can work on your heart in a number of ways, mostly it’s Him calling you to step out in Faith to do the things you deem as impossible. Ps Scott Jones puts it like this “Heaven is our destination not our destiny, our destiny is to make a difference while we are still on earth.” People will give you one million reasons not to do something but hold firmly onto the word that God has placed on your heart. We should stand for the one thing we believe in instead of falling for everything the world believes in. We need to make the conscious decision to take the first step, if it’s God’s will for our lives, He will take care of the rest. Although God isn’t always precise with His instructions, He does it to test how faithful we truly are:

By faith Abraham, when God tested him, offered Isaac as a sacrifice. He who had embraced the promises was about to sacrifice his one and only son, even though God had said to him, “It is through Isaac that your offspring will be reckoned.” Hebrews 11:17-18

We look to God for answers and direction but sometimes it's really difficult to understand what He wants from us, God makes things clear when we take time to be with Him. God wants people that won't give up on Him, that will tirelessly search for the light switch in a dark room instead of sitting still and complaining that they can't see. Yes, bad things happen to good people but that’s because God wants to turn good people into great ones, when the going gets tough get God, that’s the only thing He asks of us. 

It’s not about how much you can do, it’s about how much your heart can change while you do the things God has called you to do. If you do things with a faithful heart, the smallest step can make the biggest impact. Sometimes being faithful and stepping up may require personal sacrifices, but when you keep your focus on Jesus nothing will feel like a sacrifice because He is everything you'll want and everything you'll need. "For many are called, but few are chosen" Matthew 22:14 (KJV)

Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

This topic has been on my heart for little over a month now, I’ve rewritten this post several times in my head but I finally have an opportunity to share something that I feel we should all re-evaluate in our life, allowing it to resonate within our heart, and ultimately changing our outlook on everything, the topic is Value and Self-Worth.


“Salt is good, but if salt has lost its saltiness, how will you restore it? Have salt within yourselves, and be at peace and live in harmony with one another.” Mark 9:50


This wonderful teaching by Jesus can be interpreted in numerous ways, but my take on it is fairly simple. Value is great, but if we lose self-value, how can we expect others to value us? You can’t find value in the lives of others if you don’t highly value your purpose and reason for existence first. Always regards yourself as worthy, as valued, only then will you live at peace with the people in your life.

The Bible states that you should love your neighbour as you love yourself. The commandment always made me feel a little conceited, surely I should love others more than I love myself, but when I had this revelation about “Value” it occurred to me, I need to first understand my significance on this earth before I can fully grasp the importance of others in my life. We should first learn to love ourselves before we can even attempt to love others.

People oh so often let others determine their value and worth, they let others label them and define them forgetting that their names were already written in the stars long before they were even born. If someone makes you feel like you aren’t valued, that spending time with you is an effort rather than a joyous event and that speaking to you is just for their benefit, then I want you to know you deserve better.

Just because you value others doesn’t mean they will always place the same value on you. But at that point you should decide am I going to be the Pick n Pay No Name Brand to the people who undervalue me or am I going to choose to be the luxury brand that people will hold on to because they regard me as too valuable to use or lose. Ladies always remember one man’s junk is another man’s treasure, don’t settle for being treated like trash, you are beautiful, you are strong, humble, caring and independent and you deserve to be treated like Fine China. Find your Identity and self-worth in the Father, He loves you so much so how can you not love his perfect creation, yes I’m talking about you! 

“Worth is not achieved, it is received through God!” – PS Judah Smith.

Don’t manipulate or deceive yourself into believing that the person you regard as valuable carries any true value in your life if they not willing to place the same value on you! If you feel like you have to keep fighting to prove your self-worth, then is it really worth it? My advice to you is to simply let it go, you deserve someone who would do anything to have you in their life, a friend that would jump to help you in any time of need, a boyfriend or girlfriend that wants to show you off to the world, you should value yourself enough not to settle for anything less.

I want you to take a look at the things in your life that your regard as valuable, the things you feel you simply can’t live without. Is it worth the value you have placed on it? Some people, actually most people, regard themselves as more important than the people around them, making choices regardless of the effect it may have on others. The commandment states “Love your neighbour as you love yourself”, not “Love yourself more than you love your neighbour”. Yes you are a gifted by God, but you not God’s gift to mankind, that spot can only be filled by one person and that’s Jesus.

I want you to learn from others, when people tell you about their day, their testimony or even their revelation, don’t try and “one up” them, instead take in what they have said and learn from it! I believe if we can find value in the existence of others, in the words that they speak and the achievements they have accomplished, then we are one step closer to identifying the true meaning of what worth actually is. Words carry tremendous value when spoken from the heart, so make sure that your outward actions is a true representation of your inward thinking. Don’t be the person who only speaks empty promises and lies, make sure that every word spoken will have a positive reaction in the lives of the people that cross your path.

Be the perfect stranger that will spare some time to help out a ‘weary traveller’. Encourage your friends and family instead of snarking at their achievements. Love without boundaries even if you have been rejected, hurt or deceived.

God gave us the most valuable thing to Him, His one and only Son, because He placed value on us. In spite of how little people valued the teachings of Jesus, the miracles He displayed and the love He spread, Jesus had a mission to achieve, a purpose to fulfil. Even though people couldn’t see, or understand the purpose Jesus had while on earth, His existence made us who we are today, totally free.

Sometimes people can’t see how important you are until you take a step back, some people don’t even notice that you’ve left, but you have a predetermined destiny and you shouldn’t let the opinions of others hold you back from achieving it. Once you start to value yourself and see your identity in Christ, God will always have a way of showing you how valuable you really are... He will surround you with people who truly love you, He will bless you with favour whether it be a promotion, an increase or even a leadership role at your university or school. He will be sure to encourage you through your colleagues, your lecturers, teachers or parents. And if that fails, walk into your closest church, I can almost guarantee you that you will feel more loved than ever before.

You are worthy, you are chosen, you are loved and never forget it!

I told you so...

Guess who’s back? Back again, Nushie’s back tell your friends, okay I’ll stop before I completely lose all of you and I haven’t even got to the real stuff yet. I know it’s been a month and a half since my last post and most of you have probably came to the conclusion that I’ve given up on yet another blog but to be honest sometimes the spirit moves and sometimes it doesn’t I’ve started on a couple of different posts but haven’t felt strong enough to share it with you. But after digging deeper this Sunday the Spirit decided to smack me in the face with a little bit of a revelation, this post is about being obedient to God and the works of the Spirit.

How can one define obedience in the Christian world? We refer to it as the little voice inside our head, the gut feeling, basically our conscious that tells us what choices to make and which road to take. God doesn’t only speak to us through our conscious but through signs, the word and in prayer. I can honestly say that in the past month I have been numb to His word, I still had my quiet time and prayed every now and then but my mind was so focused on things of the flesh, wrapped up in my daily routine that the light that once shined so brightly started to dim, I focused on my everyday instead of my one day. I felt as if the Spirit left me and that my selfishness and lack of effort in connecting with God on a deeper level completely pulled me away from Him and no matter how much I tried to make the fire burn again, it was working. But if I take a step back and look at the bigger picture, God was always there, He has always been there, He spoke to me through the word numerous times, but I was too stubborn to listen, blinded by what I wanted instead of what I needed.

This is what we do, in our jobs, our decisions, our friendships, our relationships, when God tells us to take a right, we take a left because we think it’s the right way. We justify why we think going left is the best option, we manipulate the situation to make it appear as if it’s God’s will and we try and put His purpose in our decisions. And when things don’t work the way we planned we lift our heads up and ask God “Why did this happen to me?” and I can just imagine God saying “I told you so, I know what’s best for you and my plans are far greater than the plans you have for yourself” yes, I did just adapted that from Jeremiah.

One thing I can suggest is to be on the lookout for those signs and if something in your heart is telling you that “this job”, “this new friendship” “this decision” is not right for you and you know that it will only end up with you being disappointed, it’s probably the Spirit prompting you to make a u-turn and get back on track. If it’s not according to His will, then we should be willing to make a decision to walk away from the things we want because it isn’t necessarily the things He wants for us. Remember the devil comes like a thief in the night trying to steal your joy and happiness, and by you doing life your way you make it so much easier for him to shoot you down with fear, rejection, loss, anger, resentment basically anything that separates you from your mission, calling and purpose that God has set out for you.

On the way back from Langebaan two weekends ago the Spirit spoke to me, I took out my iPhone and jotted it down and I feel it’s important that I share it with you. As Christians we like to focus on how Jesus died on the cross for our sins, we focus on the sacrificial love that is Christ, but we often disregard the fact that the real miracle occurred 3 days later when Christ rose from the dead. He defeated death. His disciples believed He was gone for good, some lost faith and others doubted His resurrection. We are often so focused on what we have lost, so focused on the things that don’t go the way we hoped or planned forgetting that somewhere, somehow God is already at work, pre-planning our victory, restoring our loss, reviving our spirit and when we are presented with the miracle we need to be bold enough and confident enough to step out onto the waters in Faith knowing that we can’t chose our destiny when our destiny was already chosen for us by the creator, the King of Kings, the alpha, the omega, the beginning and the end. (Sorry thought I would try be a pastor there, it sounds so much better when they say it...)

Be obedient to God’s will and I can assure you that favour will follow your every step, invest time in speaking to God, He will respond, and put God at the center of your world, if you follow the light you will never truly be lost. 

Loving Love - Part 2

As they say the best things in life come in two’s, it takes two to tango, things are twice as nice and everyone loves a two for one deal. So I decided to make this topic a two part series, because inevitable there are two parts to life, firstly pre-love and there after true love.

There will be many loves in your life, you might think that the person you spent 5 years with was and must be the perfect one for you. He ends up breaking your heart and you simply can’t muck up the courage to move forward. I want to encourage you not to be afraid to love again. “God never works backwards, he only moves you forward” Your future will always be better than your past. Yes, great, sometimes round two does work, but then don’t go into the relationship complaining about the same things, it was your choice to go back so now you have to take it as it comes which leads me to the next subheading...

Don’t Settle

We all love to settle...We take what we can get, but why? Lack of confidence?  Loss of hope? Limited choices? Fear of rejection? I feel people tend to settle for someone they think they deserve, they aim low instead of striving high. Some tend to be with someone out of convince and commitment rather than passion and love. You may confuse attention for affection, everyone wants to be wanted, but when you knee high in a real-ationship you tend to realise that the zeal isn’t real and before you know it, you have to break the person’s heart. How do you determine if your feelings are real? Well for me personally I know that I want to see that person again as soon as they leave, hours feel like minutes and smiling becomes as normal as breathing.

God wants the very best for you, I’m not saying that the people you are choosing are not great people as we are all perfect in God’s eyes, but God wants the very best for ‘you’ in particular! He wants you to choose someone who will lift you up instead of tear you down, someone to make you flourish when the rest of the world is out to demolish and most importantly someone who is walking in the same path as you and not running in circles. There is a Mr Perfect, but with patience comes perfection.

Love to be Loved

All too often I have seen people in loveless relationships, to afraid to talk about how they truly feel. They sweep things under the rug until they choke on their own dirt. Love is a two way thing, you can’t complain about things if you not willing to work on yourself first. You go into a relationship to serve, to give and to put someone’s needs above your own.  Real love is selfless and kind, and when both people have this factor in mind, then a common denominator is found. Lack of effort and spitefulness are silent killers, as humans we always want to be put first, but when that happens it becomes all about me and less about you, and didn’t you get into that relationship, put everything on the line, just to be close to that person as much as possible? God loved us even when we didn’t love him, he loves us even though we continue to sin, he sacrificed his one and only son to save us and give us hope for better days, to give us an opportunity to be close to him. We need to love with our whole heart not just the parts we want to share otherwise you’ll be the reason for your own broken heart.

Don’t Make Someone Your Everything

As much as I just encouraged you to love with your whole heart I believe that one shouldn’t make someone your whole life. Your heart is only one part of your body, but there are many other vital organs that are needed to make your body function properly. People come and people go, love is lost, new love is found. As much as we like to hope that everything will always work out perfect in the end, sometimes it doesn’t and life throws you a curve ball. It’s your choice whether you are able to focus on the bigger picture or if you still trying to connect the dots to form the picture you have been trying to figure out for most of your life.

I wish people could understand that God isn’t a genie, we can’t just rub a lamp, make some wishes and then send Him to where he came from. We think because genies say you can’t wish for true love you kind of feel selfish when you ask God to bless you with someone perfect. I tend to dance around the subject, with the feeling that God has bigger problems to fix, I sometimes forget that He created love, He wants us to feel wanted, accepted and appreciated. He is our best friend, our wing man, our encouragement, our shoulder to cry on, the greatest listener and definitely offers the best advice.

The greatest love story ever told is the one of our saviour; it’s an epic love, an irresistible love, a love that knows no boundaries, an eternal love, a love that forgives, a love that comforts and protects, a love that offers security, assurance, understanding, peace and hope. A love that is sacrificial, effortless, and wholesome. A love that is unshakeable, unbreakable and undeniable.  His love surpasses all, even if the person you seek after is never found; find comfort in the fact that you will never truly be alone.